The Sober Diaries of a College Alcoholic

I can give it to you simply. Seriously, it’s like a scripted Shakespearean play, where every word as been said the exact same way, countless times year in and year out, since the man first wrote the damn script back in the 1500s or whatever. All travel writers start with a middle-aged individual hitting a point in life where they realize that the “American Dream” wasn’t all it’s cracked up to be. So they decide to leave behind their significant other, 2.5 children, dog and quit their job to “find themselves” out in the world. They move out to Europe, Asia and Africa to pursue a life more meaningful. They write a book about it which then gets eaten up by more middle-aged individuals yearning for the same thing. Yawn yawn yawn, bullshit bullshit bullshit. 

Now, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to go “find yourself.” In fact, I encourage it. But it’s when you try to buy into the consumerism of your experience, that you haven’t learned anything at all. Because traveling isn’t about you, and that’s exactly what all cliche travel writers will tell you. They will tell you that traveling is about going out on you own and having a life experience. Well it’s not. Traveling is about the people and the world that you decide to place your foreign ass in. 

The worst way to travel is to walk around with your face buried in a guide book. Is it a good idea to get a sense of the place? Yeah, smart even. But to travel into the unknown with no one to rely on is when traveling gets real. My point, don’t read cliche travel literature of someone’s grandoise journey. Have your own. 

So, what makes my writing different than the hyped-up, fanatical trash they throw you in Eat, Pray, Love? For one, I am not a middle-aged housewife unhappy with life. I am a University student who works in order to save up just enough money to pay the bills then jump over seas on the first extended weekend. I travel cheaply, spontaneously and probably a tad bit stupidly. I see myself getting held up at gun/knife point in a dark alley way just outside Bangkok in the near future if I keep this up. I may have a slight advantage in being a cute, petite, innocent-looking little blond girl but hey, we all make due with what we have. It’s when you rely on yourself that the real adventure happens and the people of the world begin to take on more dimension than you ever thought. 

I’m just rambling now, trying to get all my ideas down but you get the gist of this. I’ll try to make it nicer, spunkier and more enjoyable. But for now, these wary feet need to rest and think about where this shpeal is going. A vida something…

Lets just get this over with. You, World, need to pay for me to be a travel host. I’ve become addicted to travel and too much stuff of awesomely-epic proportions happens when I travel. Since February I’ve been asked invited to London Fashion Week, sat front row at Old Trafford, been on the London news, been in a gang fight, crashed a cruise staff party, jumped off Devil’s Rock (then saved someone who didn’t quite make the jump), watched humpback whales jump at sunset, starred at a piano bar, freestyled in the ghetto, partied with Mumford & Sons, Jake Gyllenhaal and Olivia Wilde all in one night, and experienced about a million other things. 

Life happens when you stop getting plastered in the same ole’ college town night after night. Get out there and see for yourself.

homestead365 asked: Sanka, ya dead mon?

Hey, no i’m not. This whole sober thing though has made me SO busy! Life unrolls a lot faster when you’re actually all there to experience it. Just good stuff has been happening and I’ve been wasting less time on the computer. How’s your journey going?

I have become increasingly lame.

But in a good way.

To start this schpeel off, I should’ve contemplated the fact that I have a hard time keeping up in my own personal journal before I started a blog. Fact of the matter is, that between college projects, work, friends and a procrastinating, daydreaming personality, I tend to start things with a dedicated, all-consuming rigor and then let up. In lamens terms, I can’t finish anything.  Yet, I’m dedicated to this life turn-around, will finish it out and this blog helps keep me accountable. Even knowing that there’s only one or two people out there who might be reading this keeps me on track. So thanks for the support. 

I say I’ve become lame because I no longer go out and get mad-wild drunk like I use to. No more waking up in strange places, no more falling down in public areas or finding rips in my clothing and no more blank stares at myself in the mirror wondering how I got to be this way. Yet, I find more and more people wanting to be around me at all times of the day, not just at night to go out. My face has narrowed out due to a lack of drinking calories and my energy levels have skyrocketed. I’ve also found that not drinking is easy. My real problem has been in drinking right. It’s funny. I was talking to a foreign exchange student from the Netherlands and we were talking about drinking. He said he was shocked by how we drink here in America. That here, it’s about the over-consumption and over-intoxication rather than anything. He seriously thought we all had drinking problems. And I agree. We can hide behind masks saying that it’s just a fun way to relax from the day, but in over-consuming we’re just trying to forget ourselves. We’re trying to be someone other than who we are, and isn’t that the American way? We want to be thinner, we want to be richer, we want to be anything other than what we are. Sorry for getting all Mr. Rogers but deep-down we all do know it’s true and sad thing is that we all do it! 

I use to drink, do stupid stuff and partake in pleasures because I liked the adrenaline rush, challenge and the thrill of discovering a different side of me. Want an even better rush? Want even more of a challenge? Try fighting that person. Try fighting that dark side of you with the nobility and courage of your true self. There’s no greater battle that you will ever face and it’s thrilling. It’s what David must’ve felt when he faced Goliath or King Leonidas against the Persians. I strongly suggest reading Dorian Gray. In a nutshell, don’t be Dorian Gray. 

Anyways, I’ve done something crazy. In the spirit of self-discovery and independence, I booked a ticket to London. I leave Friday and will be there until February 21st. I’m beyond excited! I even managed to score front row tickets to a ManU game at Old Trafford. This trip is going to be epic. Will I be broke upon return? Yes. Will it all be worth it? You bet. Cause you can’t put a price on true freedom.

Last post was me trying to get out of something and making excuses. I was pleasantly surprised by my friends’ urgency  to forget the sole moment of weakness and generated support in continuing. In fact, they were siked and want to be included somehow, which is why the blog is slowly changing a little bit. 

1 year of sobriety is back on.

Notice how I frequently war with myself. This will be a common theme.

1/6/2012, new goal date.

New/updated blog page coming soon!

Page to include…

• roommate intros
• quotes
• pictures
• polls

Get ready for the excitement!

Well that worked out great.

15 hours. 

I am officially pathetic. 

But let me explain what happened. On January 1st I was in Roatan, Honduras, checking out what is to be my summer job as a divemaster. However, there was only one position left and another girl challenging me for the spot. It came down to a face-off and this face-off required shot-gunning a beer. I’m sorry, but I wasn’t about to give up my summer job to Barbie over there when this is an opportunity I’ve been DYING for. Needless to say, I won and got the spot and will be moving to paradise for my dream summer job. 

I’m kicking myself for failing cause I really didn’t want to drink anything in 2011. But the lead up to what was supposed to be my alcohol free year actually changed my whole look at drinking. I had some of the best wines and drinks during the lead up and stayed sober but still had some of the best times! 

So, homestead365, I will be giving you a dollar a day in your quest and wishing you the best of luck. On my end, my roommates are forcing me to stay to my sober ways (in the .008 BAC range) as I document their stupidity. I may have had a drink so far this year, but I have yet to be drunk. I should probably disclose to the roomies that I will spare no detail on their behalf to you. I will also continue with alcohol factoids, tips & tricks, recipes as well as other fun stuff. 

So cheers to a year of sober craziness!